Plumbers Who Don’t Plumb: Everton vs. Spurs Preview

onward-and-upwardDavid Moyes needs a new striker. Pfft. Don’t we all. The difference, I guess, is when the manager loses so much faith in the ones on his books that he abandons the idea of having a target-man altogether. Just bench the lot of ‘em. What’s been left is the rather lonely cut figure of Tim Cahill- excellent though he is- bustling around up top on his own, frantically trying to get on the end of something. A damning indictment it is when the Aussie’s forehead is considered the equal sum of Yakubu, Saha and Beckford’s parts combined. Three league goals between them would suggest that Moyes’ hand has been forced. They’re just not pulling their weight. And, in Yakubu’s case, that’s far too many kilos to be squandering.

Our own conundrum is perhaps a little more straightforward. We either invest all our efforts in a goal-scoring centre forward this January, or continue to rotate Pavlyuchenko and Crouch until we finally discover who’s the least ineffective and bloody stick with him. And hope to god that Aran’s assertion that Bale and Van der Vaart will get twenty-apiece this season is on the money. It’s a risky strategy but it’s all we’ve got in the run up to tonight’s jaunt on Merseyside. Crouch looks to have the won the battle this time around. Make what you will of that.

Elsewhere, wee Alan Hutton is out of the running- he limped off in Saturday’s encounter with what my ten years of medical training (watching Casualty) would mark down as: a bad foot. It did look very sore. Corluka steps in, then. As replacements go, that’s as good as a full refund. Word on Gallas’ hamstring is still not out- a few more lengths of duct tape should see him right.

Marching on we go. The polish of the Beckham saga is beginning to dull under the lights somewhat now; perhaps its time to stop living in the 90s and focus on the current brand of superstar we already have knocking about the place. There’s plenty of them. I fear a draw but will happily predict a riot. Us: 2 Them (minus Cahill): 0

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