Meat Pie, Sausage Roll

Right, so let me get this straight. England are going to win the Euros now after all? Oh well that’s a relief. It was touch and go there for a moment but thanks to those courageous kids, some hardened old sea dogs and a bit of can-do attitude it looks like we’re going to bloody well do it. And if FIFA don’t like it, well, they can gay off, can’t they? Those lefty, weekend in the Alps, poppy-hating dunderheads. Yeah. Up yours, FIFA! And up yours, Spain. Yeaaah!

Funny ha has aside, the big shakers in Zurich, for once, were on the money with the whole Poppygate saga. Of course they were. All you’d need to do to come to that conclusion is find out what Alan Shearer thought and base your opinion on the exact opposite. I dinny know wha’ they’re pleeing at, said Wor Alan, in a somewhat befuddled state of alarm. It dunny make sense to me, like. A wordsearch in the Beano would have you stumped, sunbeam.

On a brighter note, Scott Parker had another all-action day at the races this weekend. By thunder. Quite what Andrés Iniesta, Xavi and David Villa made of it all, I couldn’t begin to guess. If anyone knows the Spanish for why doesn’t he leave me alone? or I can’t feel my legs! we might go some way to finding out. As a recycler of possession he’s first-rate; as a ball-winning, combative midfielder, on current form, he’s peerless.

Is that fair or has the international break finally wronged up my brain tank?

Maybe don’t answer that.

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