Despair! Like the lilywhite dove flattened in a spring-loaded cage by the plotting Alfred Borden, Spurs fell quarry to some old-fashioned magic this weekend- and they were not alone. With some of the biggest names from the Planet’s Bestest League (and Liverpool) all labouring to overcome significantly modest opponents, you’ll be happy to learn that the F.A Cup is not a complete stiff yet. Huzzah!
Leeds deserved their win. Yes, the pitch might’ve looked as if Time Team had been in residence for the afternoon, but a few divots here and there doesn’t excuse defending like prats. Colin’s United took the chances when they fell and were only a curmudgeonly premature whistle away from scoring a third. Europa League it is, then?
Talking of all things premature (steady) Lewis Holtby was handed over from Schalke this week- and a whole three days before the window closes, too. I was beginning to think Levy was rather pushing his luck with the parsimonious low-balling of the German club. But, as it was pitched by the esteemed Longwell last week:
“Either they take what Levy’s willing to offer in the next week or so, or Holtby comes in the summer and they get nothing and like it.
The question is how much is fourth months’ of Holtby’s services worth to Schalke?”
About £1.5 million it would appear. Anyway, here he is with AVB and the shirt- he’s been given the number 23. And, if you’re into that sort of thing, here’s Alan Hutton being unveiled at Mallorca. How odd.
Canaries away tomorrow.
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I’ll thank you not to again sully my good name by putting the word ‘esteemed’ in front of it unless you’re referring to my reaction* to the laziest of lazy recycled ITK horsehockey being snaffled up by some ever eager fans of our great club. What’s that you say, fly-by-night football website? Spurs are really, like, totally super serious about bidding for Leandro Damiao this time? Holy cow! And the back page of this two-bit floozepaper over here is blaring that Charlie Brown is planning to have another go at kicking Lucy van Pelt’s football! Be still, my heart…
*I’m a-Longwell and-a I’m a-steamed! Get it? It’s a weak pun. And an insultingly bad comedy Italian accent. Ah, never explain your jokes. Loses all the magic. And I’m not even Italian…*sob*.
In case ya’ll missed it, Gareth Bale treated us to a bit of the ol’ razzle-dazzle that made Sunday’s frustrating loss well worth watching in spite of the outcome.
http://test.cust.ixo.no/562d84ccc99dc3f1576f4e2b48f11c73.gif
Yoink! There’s a GIF of it at full speed as well that I’ll try to track down. Sadly it does not include the collective intake of breath and “whoa” that was audible on the television broadcast over here in Americaland.
Bale’s twinkle toes routine wasn’t as breathtaking as Andre’s hair in that photo of him with Hauptmann Holtby, but it was pretty darned majestic. Say, how’s about we have a crack at finishing third so the boy Bale sees the wisdom in sticking around for another year at least?
Bale to Byram: Buh-bye! at full speed…
http://i.minus.com/ibmmJr7jyarBAy.gif
Yoink, indeed.
Those snake hips don’t lie.
Loved this live, and being able to watch it over and over is fantastic. One trick does not a trickster make, but it almost seems like Bale’s been working in training to counteract the ‘diver’ claims – where before the options were ‘stay put and get broken’, or ‘jump and get booked’, the new third option, ‘turn on the class and make my assailant look ridiculous’ is clearly superior, at least until referees start booking him for unsportsmanlike behaviour.
I’ve watched it probably two dozen times now, and I still have no idea how he did that at the speed he did it.
Kind of like Gomes’ save of van Persie’s free kick in The Danny Rose Game. I could watch that another fifty times and still think it’s an editing room hoax.
Herr Holtby makes the bench tonight.
Lloris, Walker, Dawson, Vertonghen, Assou-Ekotto, Dembele, Parker, Lennon, Bale, Dempsey and Defoe
Subs: Friedel, Naughton, Caulker, Gallas, Livermore, Holtby and Sigurdsson
Herr Holtby makes a case to start tonight.
Fuck yeah he did.
Lloris
Walker–Caulker–Vertonghen–Benny
Dembele–Livermore
Holtby–Sigurdsson–Lennon
Bale
Barring some unexpected additions tomorrow, I think that’s our best option for this weekend’s game at West Brom. Defoe is either injured or so out of sorts he might as well be injured. Dempsey’s been okay, but we need someone with pace who will force the opposition’s center backs to play deeper and give Holtby and Sig some room to operate in the danger area.
We miss Sandro real, real bad. If Dembele goes down again we are proper fucked.
Hey, Deadline Day:
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That one’s for SSG.
Me likey.