Soldado, Vlad the Impatient and Zero Mentions of You-Know-Who

its_alive_3Call the internet police if you want but I won’t be mentioning the ‘B’ word in this parish today as there’s been enough comment on him in the brief time I’ve been offline to feed a moderately-sized army. If, of course, said army had found the secret of transforming pure conjecture into some kind of light pastry. How many calories do you think are in the words ‘MAN IS DRIVEN TO WORK AND PEFORMS WORK AT PLACE OF WORK!’?

Enough not to need pudding, I’d wager.

Just as we’re gawking into the shadowy abyss of one transfer saga, then, the resolution of another appears to be in sight. Reports from Spain (trust them selectively, is my advice) are suggesting that Roberto Soldado is on his way to Spurs for a club record £26million. Some even proposing that the Spaniard is due in London today for the mandatory once-over from the club doctor and his stethoscope. Presumably to make sure that his surname isn’t literal and there’s not a piece of shell-casing wedged deep in his derrière. Oh, look at that, it’s now all official.

Meanwhile Gigi Becali has been uncharacteristically impulsive in this whole botched Vlad Ciriches transfer. Just as the talented Romanian was set for a move to White Hart Lane- a deal far enough down the line for AVB and Levy to believe Caulker could be sold to Cardiff- the liberal, open-minded Bucharest owner decided to pull the plug and there the dream died and spun into the gutter. Wonder what the back-up plan is? Toby Alderweireld? Convert Huddlestone into a deep-lying libero?

More as I get it.


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