Redknapp to Liverpool and Other Tales of Madness

Afternoon, campers. An almost unheard of weekend edition headed straight for your peepers. If, like me, you’ve become incapacitated by the sun’s power sapping rays in recent days, you might appreciate if this particular bout of musings comes- much like the gruesome tin of stew pictured above- in bite-size chunks. Nothing overtly taxing and nothing that’ll keep you too long from your barbeque and iced sangrias.

Thank the lord you’re not paying for this stuff, that’s all I can say.

First some premium baloney. There’s a hole that needs filling down on Merseyside- it’s curiously rotund in its dimensions and sports a raised hand on which looked to perched a drinks tray. The Spanish Waiter has upped and left the building. Rumours, presumably garnered from the bottom of a cereal box, have thrown ‘Arry’s name into the shake-up; along with the usual suspects, Roy Hodgson, Sven and the one-armed drummer from Def Leppard. My thoughts, and I hope Redknapp is tracing along a similar line: about eighteen months too late, chaps. Absolute steaming rot.

Talking of which, there’s further talk of us having a glance at Diego Forlan. The all important figures- which, to me look just plain dreadful- are twenty millionish for a thirty-one year old United reject whom last year was voted Europa League Player of the Season. The key detail here is Europa League. I’ve a microwave at home made by Europa. There’s a caravan park on the South Coast of Blighty called Europa. There’s…well, you get the idea. We may not have negotiated our way entirely to the promise land just yet- the qualifiers still loom large- but hell, we’re Champions League, baby. Plus, such a price is ludicrous for a man of his age. Especially in light of the general boobery he made of his last stab at Premier League stardom. No thanks from this end.

Lastly. As you might remember, I said this in April: “If he [Dawson] doesn’t go to the World Cup this summer, I’m supporting USA”

You’ll be happy to learn that I’ve taken the star spangled banner out of my living room window and pinged the Bruce Springsteen CD out of the car stereo.

South Africa just got a whole lot more awesomer.

Spurs 5-0 Arsenal.

Ahem.

Enjoy the rest of the day.