Midfield Minefield: How Will They All Fit?

Quite a few days we’ve had. If you’re not one for surprises then there’s a good chance you might not have enjoyed it as much as the rest of us. First ‘Arry dishes out some more social hand-grenades in front of the rolling Sky Sports cameras on Saturday- turning a few phrases that’d make your average betting shop clerk blush- all before popping his feet up on deadline day with no plan of action, only to somehow pull Rafael van Der Vaart out of his sleeve like a balled-up handkerchief. What the heck have you got there, ‘Arry? It came so far out of left-field that it actually inverted on itself and went into right-field. I’m not sure where that is exactly, but I’d hazard a guess you’re not allowed to say f*ck on telly there either.

So, this is what we’ve ended up with. Until the January sales at least. No room for that planet eating, juggernaut of a centre-forward we were all pining for. Whom that might’ve been I guess we’ll never know. Our midfield looks frightening, though, doesn’t it? If creativity were a bio-fuel, in Modric, VDV, Lennon, Thudd, Bale and Kranjcar, we’ve enough to power a small country. Lithuania, perhaps. That’s not even mentioning Bentley, GDS and whoever else I’m bound to have forgotten in my haste to get a point. We’ve an embarrassment of riches, to excuse the tired expression.

Jenas. There’s Jenas, too.

My question’s a simple one, then. What’re we going to do with them all?

Answers on a postcard or by the usual methods.

Let’s hear your best elevensies. For all weathers and occasion.