Monday Morning Jibber Jabber: Sandro and Modric Wanted

gossiping_old_ladiesPaul Simon once advised us that we could call him Al. That’s not some clever tie-in with the rest of the post. It’s just, you know, a really great song. Good video, too. Not enough patio furniture in music videos these days. Or saxophone solos, for that matter. It’s all ironic nerd glasses and frisbee-sized sovereigns. So I’m told.

Anyhoo, to more pressing concerns. We turn our backs for two minutes and the ruddy tabloids are trying to auction half our squad. As Spurs could offer no conventional meat for the back pages this weekend- what with the *ahem* artful manner in which we removed ourselves from the F.A Cup†- the spotlight instead hung over some of our prized assets.

We’ll try and buzz through the stories as quickly as possible. Like removing a plaster or punching a rodent’s face off. It’ll only hurt for a second and in some cases not at all.

The Sunday Express are throwing down some Sandro to Inter pong. Reports- and I use the term loosely- suggest that the Brazilian’s owning of Clarence Seedorf at the San Siro on Tuesday evening has put the Nerazzurri on high alert. Ten million pounds sterling the price being ballyhooed about. Jermain Jenas is said be devastated.

Elsewhere the NOTW are asserting- once again- that Luka Modric will be top of Sir Alex’s this summer. Groundbreaking stuff, I’m sure you’ll agree. Next they’ll be telling us that Michael Carrick will be chucked in as a makeweight…

What’s that?

Oh. I see.

And I was feeling quite chipper this morning, too.

Roll on Blackpool.

†Mad props to Leyton Orient. Don’t Russell Slade and Barry Hearn just seem like thoroughly nice blokes?

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