Time For Something New?
There’s a line of thought which says we’ve exhausted every angle when it comes to finding new ways of trying to beat Manchester United. In short, we’ve tried everything and still they dish out the interminable hurt like Biffa Bacon.
We’ve done getting obliterated; we’ve done narrowly losing in the final minutes. We’ve tried shooting from distance for an entire game; we’ve tried placing the ball down and encouraging them shoot into in an empty net. We’ve tried collapsing after taking three-goal leads and we’ve tried giving them a three-goal lead. But then, naively, forgot about the coming back and scoring five bit. Which was somewhat of an oversight, if you ask me.
Sunday we attempted the old play really rather well but don’t score until late and make some dreadful defensive errors along the way routine. It’s a bit of a classic but, ultimately, United had seen it all before and took little joy in showing us why the crux of the scheme was indeed its downfall. Take your chances, in fact, is the name of the game.
On a positive note, the pairing of Sandro and Jake Livermore in midfield is one that appears to work. I was particularly thawed about the heart to see young Jake perform so assuredly. He could be good, you know?
The problem we have now is, what approach have we not yet tried? And how could we put it into action next time United roll into town? It’s got to be something pretty ballsy; something they won’t be expecting. Perhaps everyone could bleach their hair like Romania did at the 98’ World Cup, then set our formation up as a series of human wheelbarrows. Stick with me. With the numbers odd, obviously the keeper rides solo, but the rest of them should line up with their barrow partners in two banks of two (pairs) and a single pair up front. The shorter player must always play the part of the ‘barrow’ and the taller, in turn, must always be the ‘wheeler.’ Roles must never be reversed.
Right, I’ll scrawl down the details of the plan on the back of this bus ticket and post it off to Hotspur HQ. Like I said, we’ve tried everything else.
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